Keep Your Word Next Time.

To be honest, i thought you were different. I thought you wouldnt do this to me again. i shouldnt have to sit here and replay this in my head, trying to figure out what the hell it is that i did wrong. i think i deserve an explanation or something. i finally get the courage to let a guy in my life and you remind me why i was so hesitant in the first place. you avoid confrontation. you drag me around without telling me what it is that youre feeling and you dont tell me the truth. i just think its time you need to start caring. be a little bit more considerate about the words you say, especially if you cant keep your word. it really hurts. i thought you could possibly make me realize that their are good guys out there. you were doing well for a while. the things i told you were personal, and i only did it because you made me trust you so easily. that isnt necessarily a bad thing.i dont know why i continue to blog about you/this. i just dont understand how you could tell me that you didnt want this to end. i just feel like an idiot for believing it... did you even mean it? how could you even begin to say the things you did and then turn around and ignore me like this? i just dont understand.. im stuck trying to figure it out. even if you just dont like me, id like to hear that. its better than feeling like this. i hate myself for trusting in something i couldnt control and i feel stupid for thinking this was real. it was all too perfect. you were too perfect. too perfect to be real and too perfect to actually be mine. thats how it always seems to be.